Friday, January 29, 2010

Atheist Boycotting a Stamp?!?!

Yep, you read that correctly. An atheist group is boycotting the US Postal Service because thay plan to release a stamp in August with Mother Teresa on it.

Nevermind the fact that she won the Nobel Peace Prize and nevermind the fact that she provided aid, love, and care to thousands of, this atheist group called the "Freedom from Religion Group" has come out and said, "Mother Teresa is principally known as a religious figure who ran a religious institution. You can't really separate her being a nun and being a Roman Catholic from everything she did."

The FRG are crying because they say that having Mother Teresa on a stamp it
"violates postal regulations against honoring individuals whose principal achievements are associated with religious undertakings."

Give me a friggin break. I mean seriously, are you kidding me?!?! Maybe I'm the only one who thinks this but don't atheists believe that there isn't a God? So why should they care? They want a woman that delivered hope and love to thousands of people to not be recognized because she was a woman of faith? Does this mean that the only people that should get recognized for humanitarian efforts not believe in anything? If that was the case, why would someone believe in helping people or even love for that matter?

If I was the US Postal Service, which I'm not, I would be sure and write them a nice response that says, "Get a Life...and some faith for that matter."

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Oh Harold

I generally don't write political agenda blogs, but I can't help but write about this.

Anyone known a flip flopper? John Kerry comes to mind, but I think I've found one who's mastered it.

Harold Ford Jr.

Yep, the former congressman from Memphis is making it an art form. He comes from a long line of corrupt and sleazy family members that have graced Memphis in politics for a long time. Many people were hoping when he ran for Congress here in Memphis a few years back that he would change the image of his family. Unfortunately for him and Memphis, that didn't happen.

He also ran for Senate in Tennessee a few years back and lost. Up until now the biggest issues that Ford Jr. ran into was his lack of job history, him pissing off his own party, and taking under the table trips.

When he lost his run for Senate in the largely conservative state of Tennessee, he relocated to New York City and took a job teaching for NYU. Additionally he is a Vice President at Bank of America, bringing in around a million dollars a year, and is a political adviser for NBC's morning show "Today." But that hasn't stopped him from trying to run for senate in the state of New York, which is the real reason he moved there in the first place. The problem? His conservative views (for a democrat) doesn't match up with the very liberal views that it takes to win the senate seat in NY. So he did what many "carpetbaggers" like Hillary Clinton did before him...he changed his views.

He has changed his positions on same sex marriages and civil unions as well as changed his wording on abortion. When running for senate in Tennessee, he said he was pro-life. Now that he's running in NYC, he's changed his wording slightly from "life" to "choice." Not a big deal if you're a politician.

It has been interesting, to say the least, to see him get grilled in the media.
NY Times Article. I loved this stuff....

"Mr. Ford, 39, expressed enthusiasm about his new hometown, though he described a life quite different than most New Yorkers. On many days, he is driven to an NBC television studio in a chauffeured car. He and his wife, Emily, a 29-year-old fashion executive, live a few blocks from the Lexington Avenue subway line in the Flatiron district. But Mr. Ford said he takes the subway only occasionally in the winter, to avoid the cold when he cannot hail a cab.

Asked whether he had visited all five boroughs, he mentioned taking a helicopter ride across the city with fellow executives, at the invitation of Raymond W. Kelly, New York City’s police commissioner. “The only place I have not spent considerable time is Staten Island,” he said, adding that “I landed there in the helicopter, so I can say yes.

Mr. Ford declined to discuss what he is paid by the bank, but publicly available data suggests that he earns at least $1 million a year. Asked what role outsize pay packages played in fueling the financial crisis, Mr. Ford said he objected to capping executive compensation on Wall Street. “I am a capitalist,” he said. “I believe that people take risk, and there are rewards if they do well; they should lose if they don’t.

But what is likely to gain the most immediate attention is his record on issues, which Ms. Gillibrand’s defenders say is too conservative for New York"

Continue reading the NY Times article for more fun and to see all the areas he flip flops.

Here is another article from the Memphis Commercial Appeal where they take him to task.

This one isn't what I would consider the media, but it is pretty funny nonetheless.
(If you can't see this video on Facebook, check it out on my blog
The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Alpha Dog of the Week - Harold Ford Jr.
Colbert Report Full EpisodesPolitical HumorEconomy

If anyone can't see what is going on here, let me spell it out for you what is going on. He's lining up his run for the Presidency in the soon future. Sounds like a noble guy eh?

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Hoops for Haiti article

I really enjoyed this article. Greg Doyle is a national writer for CBS Sports and does a great side of getting under people's skin. You don't see him give high praises very often, which makes this article even better.

My favorite quote:

"And if you're feeling good at this moment about Kentucky basketball fans, please allow yourself to feel good about the Kentucky basketball coach. Calipari isn't well-liked by people outside of the Kentucky fan base. We all know that. Memphis and Massachusetts reached the Final Four under him, and both schools symbolically vacated those appearances after reports of NCAA violations. That's the history, and you know the history, and because of that history, a lot of people -- a lot of you -- don't like John Calipari. I get that.

Me, I like Calipari. Always have. I have no idea if he knew that an agent had seduced his star player, Marcus Camby, back when Camby was a junior at UMass in 1996. And I have no idea if he knew that his star recruit, Derrick Rose of Chicago, had found an objectionable way in Detroit to post the SAT score necessary to be eligible as a freshman at Memphis.

But I know this:

An earthquake devastated Haiti on Jan. 12, and within five days Calipari had used the power and the passion of Kentucky basketball to raise more than $1 million for victims, with more on the way as Calipari is auctioning off a dinner with himself and Ashley Judd to the highest bidder. President Obama felt the need to call Calipari and thank him, and Kentucky basketball fans, for their help. Maybe you can tell, but I still can't believe this story. The Kentucky basketball community gave $1 million! That's as much as all of India. It's more than Sweden ($850,000). Nothing against those countries, either. Good for them. Every bit helps.

Kentucky lost to unranked South Carolina on Tuesday night, but I've never been more impressed with the Wildcats."

Check out the rest of the article if you want.


Spooning is something that I've always hated. The Urban Dictionary term for 'spooning' is a form of affection where a couple lies facing the same direction (back of one touching front of the other).

Basically the jist of it is a girl faces one direction and a guy lays behind her in the same form and direction of the girl. Sounds cute right?

Not really. Here's my thing...

The girl gets to sleep and stay warm while the guy gets hair in his face, an arm that is uncomfortably wrapped over the girl, and the other arm that falls asleep on him and thus he loses feeling in it. How is that even remotely comfortable or cute?

Call me old fashion, but there are better ways of sleeping.

Monday, January 25, 2010

My First Love

As most have read, I'm working out a lot in the mornings with my wife and have been enjoying more and more as I go (I know...crazy). But the one workout that is kicking my butt right now is my Weight and Resistance Training class that I'm taking on Tues and Thurs. I am very fortunate that I know the professor/drill sergeant that is going to be putting me through the ringer for the semester. Let me say that I know her through her husband and one of my best friends. We've met on a couple of occasions and have never really talked much. However, this class will allow us to get to know one another a little better. Additionally my drill sergeant and her husband are HUGE Memphis fans.

Here's a little back story...

Last Wednesday night, Memphis had a chance to set the record for consecutive conference wins in a row and unfortunately, they lost. So they are now tied in the history books with a team for the most wins in a row in conference play. The irony is who they are tied with...Kentucky. Yep, that same team that took their former coach and that same team that happens to be my favorite team. So, living in Memphis, I'm always faced with the dilemma of rooting for two teams that don't like each other. I always tell people that UK is my 1a and Memphis is my 1b. My explanation for Memphis is pretty simple. My dad went to Memphis and I remember watching games with him as a kid. Also, I currently go to Memphis, work for the soccer team, and have lived in the city for some time. So Memphis is in my blood.

Well, I was talking to my drill sergeant last week and asked her if her husband was upset about the loss, to which she replied, "Yes, I just left him alone as he didn't want to talk." So we talked a bit about the irony of who they were tied with and I said something to the effect of, "You know, I'm happy because I'm a UK fan and a Memphis fan and they both get to share the record." She looked at me with an almost disgusted look on her face and said, "NO, you cannot be a fan of both teams", to which I replied, "I can't be a fan of two different teams or just those two particular teams?" She smiled and told me that it was UK and Memphis that I had to pick sides with.

So I feel the need to explain my fanhood for UK. It was, my first love....

I grew up in Lexington, KY listening to the legendary Caywood Ledford calling every game. My cousin, Randy and I use to play nerf basketball in his downstairs basemen while listening to games. While most kids growing up would pretend to be Batman, Superman, Michael Jordan, or Joe Montana, I would pretend I was Rex Champman.

Rex was considered a "local" kid from Bowling Green, KY and was a beloved player for UK. "King Rex" and "Rexington Kentucky" were just a few of the names he was given as a player at UK.

From then on I was hooked. I wanted to be Rex Chapman and I wanted to play for the University of Kentucky basketball team. The only problem was that I never grew much and I was always better at soccer.

I spent a large part of my childhood going to UK games at Rupp Arena and football games at Commonwealth Stadium. While the football team isn't as well known as their basketball team, I followed them nonetheless. (I can't stand it when someone is a fan of one sport, say football, and not a fan of the see that a lot with UT fans. Look people, you support a UNIVERSITY not a sport.)

When I moved to Memphis, my love for all things UK actually grew because I was away from going to games and chatting with friends about UK issues. My love for Memphis increased a lot as well because I started attending Memphis games (yes, football AND basketball) and my dad is a pretty big fan.

No one was ever bothered by my fanhood of UK until last March. when John Calipari left Memphis for Kentucky, then people told me I had to choose sides. Or as my drill sergeant stated, "You can't be a fan of's not allowed." Pretty funny eh? Well, got news for ya...I am. I am a fan of both and nothing, not Calipari or even living in Memphis, will make me change my mind. I don't pick my coaches or players, I just support the team no matter what.

I do get the question of what happens if they play each other? Who do I root for? Well, in soccer I root for Memphis because they are my boys, my team, and paying for my school. In basketball, that's another story.

You don't ever forget or root against your first love.

My Apologies

I do apologize to those of you that 'depend' on my blogging to get you through your day. (Really I'm just speaking to Mrs. McGoo).

School has completely provided a way to take away all the down time I had on Christmas break and has left me with little time to blog and think of creative things to blog about.

I promise to try and update it more than I have, but I'm still getting my feet wet with school, so give me some time and I'll get back to updating it two to three times a week.

Until then, Go Saints!

Friday, January 22, 2010

Technological Changes...and me

Much has changed since the last time I was in school 13 years ago. I've come to realize this at an alarming rate. When I was last in school cell phones weren't around, the Internet was just coming about, and you typed your research papers out on a typewriter. Now they have sites like to you submit your papers to to check for plagiarism. Crazy isn't it?

Yes, I know, I'm dating myself, but I think I'm just realizing how strange things are now to me. I am amazed at how many kids in class are piddling on their phone. Example...I'm in a classroom with about 90 students in my sociology class. The classroom is pretty full and I sit in the middle of the class. While listening to the professor lecture, I looked over at a few students and saw all of them with their phones in their lap, texting on them or on facebook. I'm serious when I say that nearly every single one that I looked at had their phone out somewhere. And it was then that I thought, "This is an 8am, are their that many people they know that are out of class that they are talking to?" Answer is, most likely not. Most likely, their friends are in some other class texting back and forth.

It's just amazing to me how socially needy young adults are for technological communication. I'm no better in some areas as my cell phone has become the lifeblood of my communication with people (That and email). It almost seems archaic to think back to when people didn't have a cell phone to text with in class.

Additionally I think I'm even more amazed at how professors don't see this going on. I'm sure they hear a phone ring or see someone on a phone here or there, but now that I'm among the student body, I see things in a whole new light. I could write a dissertation on how dependent students really are on their cell during class.

Here is an article from the NY Times that states that kids spend near 8 hours a day on their computer, phone, or mobile device. Computers for students, I understand, but let's not fool ourselves here. The majority of that is not spent doing homework or studying. I would be willing to bet it's more than 8 hours for some of the kids in my classes.

All in all it's the way of the future. However, it still doesn't change the fact that my professors are teaching while the students aren't listening.

Are we that distracted?

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Mr. McGoo's Challenge

I blogged a while back about how I've started working out with Mrs. McGoo and my morning mistress and how frustrating it was at first. Well, I've decided to let this blog be my public accountability for my workouts. So as I continue to lose weight and gain strength, everyone will get to see what is going on. As of right now, I've lost 5lbs.

To catch everyone up, Mrs. McGoo and I started working out to Jillian Michaels 30 Day Shred and today marks our move into Session 2. So I would assume the level is going to be bumped up a tad and the conditioning is going to be tougher. Good. I'm ready for a new challenge!

Speaking of challenges, I want to clue you in on one that I have right now. If there is anyone that doesn't read Mrs. McGoo's blog, Verbal Vomit, you should. Not only should you, but you would come to understand her heart for the children of Africa in many of her posts. One of the things that Mrs. McGoo and I have been discussing lately is that we feel that God has laid on our hearts to take a mission trip to Africa. She and I have both always had a heart for Africa. My mens soccer program is involved in the ONE Campaign.

While it offers breath-taking scenery, Africa also offers a nation overrun with poverty, AIDS, orphans, and civil war. Since we've been married, Mrs. McGoo and I have talked about making a difference in the kingdom and we have heard the Lord speak and he is leading us to Africa. The truth is, those are my brothers and sisters over there. God's children. Africa is in my heart, therefore it's mine. I take responsibility for it and everything that is happening there. It's time to jump in and stop standing by idly while millions are suffering. I am going to make a difference.

So how does that happen? Well, a lot of prayer, faith, and unfortunately a lot of money. Most that know Mrs. McGoo and I, know that that is not something we have a lot of. I am working for the University of Memphis Soccer team while I am going back to school (20hrs in spring) and Mrs. McGoo is working full time while going to Nursing School. We are so blessed that we don't over-extend ourselves and do not have any debt. But, how do we go on a trip that we cannot afford? The answer is simple. God. God will provide like he always has. Don't believe me?

Here's God providing....

On Dec. 30th, I was talking with a friend of mine (who shall remain nameless) and telling them about my desire to go on a mission trip with Mrs. McGoo and how we were going to try for a mission trip. We talked about other stuff as well and while talking, my friend posed a suggestion to me. Here's what they said:

Friend: "well I'm thinking about a challenge for you"
: oh yeah?

Friend: "yeah! I absolutely mean no bad feelings on this challenge at all, and I think you are fine just the way you are. I mean that but I know I respond better with a challenge and goal. What about for every pound you lose between now and the trip I will pay $5 toward the trip (cap it at $500 or 100 lb.)"

Now that's a challenge isn't it? Is God not involved in that? I don't see how he couldn't be....

So not only does the Lord provide a vessel to facilitate a challenge and help generate/raise funds for a trip to further the kingdom, but I also I get to lose weight/get more healthy in the process.

Sounds like a challenge to me. It is almost like I'm running a really long 5K and have picked up a sponsor to help contribute to a greater cause. Pretty neat. I didn't know what to say to this friend other than a resounding YES!!

Additionally, not only am I getting up in the morning to workout, but I also am taking a weight and resistance training class in school and happen know the professor. She's going to kick my butt in workouts and I'm going to love every minute of it. Little does she know that she's helping further the kingdom.

So really it's an awesome feeling knowing that God provides. In the small things and in the large things. God is there.

I'm going to help these brothers and sisters. They don't know it yet. But they will. You'll see.

My Children. My Heart. My Africa.

Monday, January 18, 2010


"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moment of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy" - Dr. Martin Luther King

Today is Martin Luther King Day. I never gave the day much thought honestly, and then last semester, I studied the civil rights movement and took a trip to the National Civil Rights Museum. I wish I had more than the 2 hours than I allotted for the trip because it was a very moving experience. I was fortunate enough to write a research paper on the integration of college basketball and learned so much about the struggles that many African-Americans endured just trying to assimilate themselves to the rest of the basketball world. Additionally we spent a good 3-4 weeks studying the civil rights movement and covered a lot of ground. However, by far, my favorite time was going to the National Civil Rights Museum.

One of the documentaries that was shown at the National Civil Rights Museum was this video.

I encourage anyone that hasn't been to the museum in Memphis to take a look sometime. The museum is free on Mondays and you could honestly spend a full day in there looking at all the history. I plan on going back soon.

Additionally, we watched the documentary in our history class called "At the River I Stand" which is about the Memphis sanitation workers strike back in 1969. It is actually the event that brought Dr. King to Memphis and shows his final "Mountain Top" speech before he was murdered. It's a fascinating documentary.

So today, even though I was not around during the civil rights movement, nor have I ever had to endure struggle like some, I pay my respects and give thanks to the great Dr. Martin Luther King and all those who have sacrificed for a greater purpose. I only hope to be half the man he was.

It would be an honor.

The Big Blue Nation comes through for Haiti

Everyone knows I'm a pretty big UK fan and it is days like Sunday that I really enjoy professing my fanhood towards the Wildcats.

By now everyone has heard of the devastation in Haiti that was caused by a massive earthquake. Well, Coach Calipari and the University of Kentucky held a telethon on Sunday to help raise money for Haiti and the victims of the earthquake. Leave it to the Big Blue Nation to come out swinging and completely hit one out of the park. By the end of the night, the telethon had raised $500,000 in relief aid. Then I find out that some of Cal's friends matched what was raised and now the number is set at $1,000,000. That's really impressive!

I was also moved by the help from the coaching community from with some pretty high profile coaches chipping in to offer a donation. Ashely Judd offered up some help as well as Dick Vitale. The most interesting part of it all might have been the former UK coach Tubby Smith calling in and making a donation. Additionally, he hung up the phone by saying, "Go Gophers and Go Big Blue."

The Wildcat players also helped man the phones, so for some lucky callers, they got to speak with future NBA players and childhood idols. The one that probably has the most personality of the bunch is DeMarcus Cousins. Cousins has gotten a bad rap lately because of a few instances where he has flown off the handle in a game. Well, I'm here to tell you that he's a good kid and as shown in this video, loves babies.

Here's a link to an article that talks about the great event.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Juiimy Kimmel takes on Jay Leno

I've never really watched late night shows other than SportCenter, but this stuff going on between Jay Leno, Conan O'Brien, and NBC is interesting.

This video is from the "10 and 10" segment on the Leno show where Jay interviews other TV and Radio hosts. This time he interviews Jimmy Kimmel. If you've got a few minutes, take a watch. It's pretty funny. He calls Leno out.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Channeling My Inner Billy Madison

That's right, today marks the first day back for yours truly to school. While I don't have my lunch packed up and am waiting on the bus to pick me up, I can assure you that I do feel old.

I am taking 20 hours this semester in hopes of speeding up the process of graduating. I'm mixing in a little bit of fun with a lot of work. Here's what my schedule will look like for the Spring '10.

8:00am - Sociology
9:10am - Macroeconomics
10:20am - Computer Application to Sports and Leisure
12:00pm - Outdoor Recreation Education in Urban America

8:00am - Theatre
9:40am - Commercial Rec and Tourism
11:20am - Free Weights and Machines

Sounds like fun huh? I try to mix in the boring ones with some interesting ones. In case you didn't know, my major is Sports and Leisure Management, so that is why I have three Sports and Leisure classes. If you see me walking around during these hours, I promise I'm not skipping class. Mrs. McGoo would like to know if I am so please don't tell her. ;)

I promise I'll try and blog as much as I can, but I make no promises once school starts. We'll just see how time permits. Last semester I hardly had any homework as all my classes were lecture classes. School and soccer definitely keep me busy.

Until then...tootles

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Earthquake in Haiti

I hope everyone takes time today to say a prayer for the people and country and Haiti. The more and more I read about the 7.0 earthquake that hit that island the more I am beginning to feel a huge hurt in my heart for them. There was massive devastation and utter destruction of some areas of the country.

If anyone feels compelled to help out in some small way, you can donate to a relief fund by clicking here. It's an organization called "Compassion International" that helps remove children from poverty. They also have set up a disaster relief fund.

God bless Haiti and their families.

The Eyelid Movie Rating System

Let me begin by saying that I am in no way shape or form a movie expert or critic. I do however have a strong affinity for movies and is proven by my library of movies that rivals Blockbuster video. I've been collecting and going to movies for as long as I can remember.

When I was a kid one of my favorite things to do was to go to the movies with my grandparents. I remember one time my grandparents (fathers side) took my brother and I to the Southbrook Mall in Whitehaven, Tn and we not only watched the "Cannonball Run" at the theater, but we also bought ninja throwing stars to take back home with us and destroy my bedroom wall in our house (we'll save that story for another day). I also remember my grandfather (mom's side) taking us to the movies to see "The Lone Ranger" and showing up to the movies early so I could meet the REAL Lone Ranger and his trusty horse "Silver." The Lone Ranger signed an autograph for me and gave me a real silver bullet as a souvenir (This would obviously not go over well in today's politically correct world).

Additionally, I spent a lot of time in high school watching movies. I worked at Blockbuster for about a year so I always got free movies to watch and, in some instances, was actually given surplus movies to take home and watch and review. Most of those movies were ones that no one would actually want to rent without a "Blockbuster Employee Approval" stamp next to it. Everyone has seen "Forrest Gump" right? Well these movies would be the equivalent of "Forrest Gump 5 - Forrest Wheelchairs America." So you can see, they were not the greatest of quality movies.

There are a couple of things one can take from this...I'm old and I love my movies. That being said, I've been very fortunate to have acquired over the years a large volume of movies. Most of my movies were acquired in my single days when I didn't have a wife to keep me from blowing all my savings on DVD's. This is one of the reasons I tell my single friends to enjoy being single...because you lose movie watching and buying privileges. In all actuality, my wife doesn't have a problem with me watching movies...she's just not wanting me to pay the money it costs to watch them. Movies have gotten really expensive these days and she knows I'll blow through some funds really quick. Not to mention she's my sugar momma while I go back to school so I'm on a strict allowance. (Just wait...when I get out and start making money I'm buying all the movies I want*)

Anyway, about 5 or so years ago I began to realize that whenever I saw a crummy movie, I'd just take the time to get a nap in the theater. I'm sure there are people that have fallen asleep in movies before, but I took it to an art. We're not talking about your normal nodding off or closing of the eyes kind of sleeping. We're talking about completely being oblivious to the comings and goings of all movie watchers and when the movie lets out.

Here are two examples of my sleeping "in" movies.

1. A group of my friends and I decide to go out for dinner and a movie. We head to see the movie "The Forgotten" at our local cinema. I'm not really crazy about going to see the movie, but as a single guy, you don't want to sit home by yourself and not doing anything. So I reluctantly go to dinner and the movie. Dinner was great, but once we got to the movie and started watching, I knew it was going to be horrible. After giving the movie 20 mins or so to develop and see how bad it would be, I gave up and fell asleep. What is memorable about the movie is the way that my friend Steve woke me up. Midway through my night of rest and relaxation there was a scene in the movie where a car gets "T-boned" from another car. Normally this wouldn't be that big of a deal to the normal person, but Steve has the nerves of a chick in a horror movie. When the car hit the other car, Steve screamed like a 13 year old girl and in the process, smacked me in the face and thus scaring the snot out of me. Seriously, I thought the rapture was coming and am thankful that I took the time to use the bathroom before the movie. Needless to say, I wanted to forget "The Forgotten."

2. Similar situation as before...This time we went to see the movie "The Upside of Anger." I'm not sure how many people went with us to the movie, but I do know that one of my friends Candace, who was a singer at our church, invited a couple of her musician friends to join us. There were not many people in the movies that night and I can tell you why. The movie was one of the worst movies I've ever seen. First of all, it had Kevin Costner in it and that should have been my first warning sign. Here's a rule...if a movie has Costner in it and it's not a sports movie, don't watch it, it will be garbage. Secondly, the movie received horrible reviews and thus that, in most cases, can be a precursor to a bad movie. So, I gave my normal 20 min glance to make sure that it was going to be what I thought it would be and then I decided to sleep. This wasn't your normal "I'm going to close my eyes and hopefully I don't snore sleep." No, this was "Wow, there really is no one here and there are 4 seats next to me, I think I'm going to lay down." Laying down is exactly what I did. I unfolded four chairs and took a hour and a half nap. It was glorious. Some of the best sleep I'd gotten in a long time. I would have slept longer if it wasn't for Candace poking me with her crooked finger and telling me that they were leaving. The lights were up and people were cleaning up around me, so I thought it was probably a good time to get up and head home. I remember one of the musicians looking a me and saying, "Do you realize you just wasted $7?" To which I replied, "No, YOU wasted $7 watching that garbage of a movie! I grabbed a hold of my money and made it into a quality hour and a half of sleep." Some of the best money I've ever spent.

All of this past knowledge and experience led me to create my own movie rating system. My system is based on whether or not I should keep my eyes open for a movie. I kind of feel like this is something that the world is in need of. Seriously though, who has a rating system like mine? It's like a star rating, but minus the stars. Remember in elementary school when you would get stars for conduct? Yeah, so if you weren't good, you didn't get a star. So applied to movies, who wants to give a star for a movie that is not very good?!?!

Basically my rating system breaks down like this:

  • Eyes Wide Shut - This is named after the Stanley Kubrick movie. I think it represents this system perfectly. This type of movie is unwatchable and you might as well sleep through it. This has also been called "Two Eyelids Closed." Good examples of these movies were listed above as well as "The Notebook", "Mixed Nuts", and "Waterworld."
  • One Eyelid Closed - This is a movie that someone makes just to make a dime. Actors generally reserved for these kind of roles are typically Nicolas Cage and John Travolta. Date movies are generally in this category since they usually involve Matthew McConaughey, Ryan Reynolds, Sandra Bullock, and/or Kate Hudson. These movies are one step away from being "Eyes Wide Shut" but have some sort of redeeming quality like scoring points with the girlfriend/wife or some comedic value. You are allowed to watch these movies, but you might want to keep one eyelid closed just to get a little rest. Examples of such movies are: "How to lose a guy..", "The Proposal", or "The Holiday."
  • One Eyelid Open - Note: I realize this is somewhat the same as "One Eyelid Closed" but it isn't. It's different ok! This is a movie that usually comes out around the holidays or might be called the "summer blockbuster." These are the typical movies that people go see on a regular basis. This is a very versatile type of rating because it applies to a lot of movies. I went and saw one just recently that was called "The Blind Side" and you wanna know when I saw it? Around the holidays. These are feel good movies that make you wish you were a better person, or are the types of movies that make you wish you were a spy. One might want to sleep in these movies, but it's recommended that you at least keep one eyelid open or open your eyes for a bit just so you can see a good message or funny scene. Examples of these movies are: "The Blind Side", "Radio", "Invictus."
  • Two Eyelids Open - This rating is reserved for movies that are incredibly directed, acted, or produced. You don't see many movies like these that have bad actors or directors and it is a pretty select group. In order to preserve the validity of this rating, one cannot throw this rating out very often. It doesn't have to win an Oscar, but it should come close. One shouldn't want to sleep in these movies as you could learn something from them and it gives you something to talk about with your date or friends. Examples of this rating include: "Life as a House", "Million Dollar Baby", "Fight Club", "Slumdog Millionare", "Avatar", "The Dark Knight."
  • Eyes Wide Open - Once in a while a movie is made that becomes an instant classic. These generally win a lot of awards or at least should win. These movies don't come around very often as I've been known to tell people that "in order to see a great movie, one sometimes much watch 100 crummy ones." This rating can also be called the "Money Back Guarantee" because you are so confident that it is a great movie that you're willing to give someone their money back if they don't like it. Blinking in these movies are strictly on a need to blink basis. You don't want to miss greatness as work. Examples of these movies are: "American Beauty", "Braveheart", "Shawshank Redemption", "Schindler's List."
So there you have it. This is the new rating system that all movies should be judged. I'm hoping that this movement can take a cult like following and gain steam throughout our subculture. It is in your hands people. Use this power wisely.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Guy Code and Marriage Code

Have you ever heard someone use the term "Guy Code" and wondered what it meant? I've often been asked what "Guy Code" really is. The truth is, there isn't a real list for what it means, but it is something that all men are suppose to know. It is something that tells us what is allowed in conversations and what isn't. Additionally the code tells us what is acceptable to do and in some instances, what men should never do.

Generally "Guy Code" is not supposed to be talked about (Kind of like "Fight Club"), but because there are men out there that have not had someone tell them what the code is and what it is about, I'm going to list a few examples of the code.

Here are some of the examples of "Guy Code":

  • Bro's before Ho's - You stay true to your guy friends before you stay true to a girl. This is rule #1 in "Guy Code"
  • The Urinal/Toilet Etiquette. - Never go to a stall or urinal that someone is in unless it is unavoidable. If it is unavoidable, continue to look down at yours and there is to be no talking in restroom
  • Movie Seating - Same example as mentioned above
  • Avoid "Friendly Bonding" Situations - Examples...Two men in a bed at once (if bed must be shared no feet touching), two men riding motorcycles together (if you must jointly ride, men are not allowed to hold on - even if you fall), sharing a beverage together (if beverage is shared, no sharing straws), wearing similar cologne, sharing an umbrella
  • Wingman Protocal - If your buddy is showing an interest in a cute girl you must talk to her chatty and possibly unattractive friend to distract her from sabotaging your buddy's chances . (1 hour limit to said rule to give time for digits to be acquired)
  • Guy's Don't Tattle On Other Guys - This one is a tough one, but you have to recognize the code and realize that karma will catch up to the bad guys

Now, these are just some of the rules of "Guy Code" and there are many more. I feel like these are OK to mention and I won't be losing guy points by speaking about the code. However, there is an exception for "Guy Code."

See video for exception:

As mentioned in the video, "Marriage Code" and "Guy Code" intersect each other. Basically, the rules of "Guy Code" forbid me from telling anyone anything about my buddies except my wife. Why? As mentioned, "Marriage Code" intersects with "Guy Code" and I am allowed to spill the beans to my wife on the latest gossip that may be happening in someone's life. However, my wife is bound by "Marriage Code" which is paralleled to "Guy Code" in these instances and therefore cannot say anything to her girlfriends unless approved by husband who knows the rules of "Guy Code." It's rather easy to understand isn't it?

- So what is "Marriage Code" and what rules apply?
For the sake of the argument, I'll address "Marriage Code" from a mans perspective.

Here are a few rules in "Marriage Code":
  • Wife before Bro's - You stay true to your wife before your buddies. This is rule #1 in "Marriage Code" and trumps Rule #1 in "Guy Code"
  • Compliment Attire - No matter what, you tell your wife she looks beautiful and even when you don't think so, you lie. Acceptable responses to "Does this dress make me look fat?" are: "Of course not", "Nope, but it does make you look hot" (The one I prefer is "No way you are going out in that because I don't want to deal with all the men staring at you." **This covers me even if the dress looks bad on her**)
  • Right of Refusal - It's a great excuse for when you don't want to do something and it is an OK way to throw your spouse under the bus. For instance, this gives you the right to tell your buddies that you can't go to the game because your wife is making you mow the grass when in all actuality you're just too lazy to get off the couch and would rather watch the game on your big screen. Or you just don't want to go to dinner with that annoying couple that you are only friends with because of mutual friends and you tell them that your wife is feeling ill when really you just don't want to hear about the different types of color patterns the couple is looking at for their bedroom.
  • Always Asterisk - See below for explanation as this has recently been added to "Marriage Code"
The (*) has been recently added to "Marriage Code" by my friend Chuck. As he has put it, "this is your disclaimer you are given when you get married." I asked for his assistance in explaining this and here is his response:

"The (*) means that your friends should take your commitment with grain of salt.
For instance, 'I am in for hanging Friday night*' OR 'I am going on a ski trip by myself or with Jeff this year*'"
"In other words your permission slip has not yet been signed. Please see the attached permission slip and use for future planning."
Boys Night Out Permission Slip

"Any email with commitment and no (*) means you have gotten the hall pass from your wife or you are foolishly in jeopardy of being heavily razzed by your friends which means your permission slip was not signed.

Also, after removing your (*) and giving true commitment, it is expressly prohibited to ask any of the following questions with your significant other before you go out..
"Are you sure its ok?"
"Do you feel ok?"
"What you gonna do tonight or who are you hanging with?"

All are grounds for the termination of your permission slip and further razzing from your bros."

I'd like to send a special thank you to my bro Chuck for the new addition to "Marriage Code" because this one is an important one.

I hope this has helped everyone in understanding the rules that men must follow. Granted, these are only a few and "Guy Code" can vary from friend to friend. Additionally, "Marriage Code" most definitely will vary from one understanding spouse to one crazy spouse. However one constant remains the same...

Men will always live by a code.

Vols Rock...Shock...Jayhawk

(Disclaimer. This will most likely be the first and last time I ever put a picture of a UT basketball player on my blog. So don't get use to it. It dumbs this blog down)

I sat down yesterday to watch an NFC playoff game between the Cardinals and Packers with some friends. One of my buddies is a UT fan and I knew the basketball game between Tennessee and Kansas was coming on as well. I mentioned to him that I'd like to watch about 10 mins or so of the first of the game. I figured in 10 mins or so KU would open up a sizable enough lead in order to make the game unwatchable. See, Kansas is the #1 team in the country* and UT, while the #15 team in the country*, they have lost 3 of their better players to suspensions and 1 player, Tyler Smith, has been kicked off the team.

Brief history: Four players all were arrested on New Years because they had drugs, open containers of alcohol, and unregistered weapons in their car. Since then, Smith, arguably their best player has been kicked off the team.

This has pretty much been the UT moniker for the past couple of months since players on the football team robbed people at a gas station in Knoxville. Needless to say, this didn't help the public perception that UT is a school for criminals.

Those that know me know that I'm a huge Kentucky and Memphis fan and thus the common denominator rivals of both are Louisville and Tennessee. Living in Tennessee as I do makes it easier to hate UT all the more because I'm around them more than Louisville fans. I'm also married into a large family of Kansas fans so I've adopted them as one of the teams I pull for as long as they aren't playing UK or Memphis. All this in mind rooting against UT yesterday was a given.

With said issues in mind, I did not expect UT to put up much of a fight and I was pulling for Kansas to wipe the floor with them. This, however, did not happen. UT hung with the #1 team* for most of the game and as the time went on my buddies and I found ourselves watching the whole game with the NFC game on the small screen off to the side. As the game went on, I thought in the second half that the UT players would wear down and Kansas would impose their will on them and the game would get out of hand. The problem is that one, no one told UT they were supposed to wear down and two, Kansas shot the ball atrociously throughout the game and it never got better.

By the 17 min mark of the second half UT actually took the lead and never relinquished it. Kansas battled back to only being down by 3 with around a min or so. Then, out of nowhere, this kid hits a 3-pointer with the shot clock running down to zero.

This kid's name is Skylar McBee. If you haven't heard his name you're not alone. He's a walk-on
player that isn't the kind of player you'd want taking a shot as the shot clock is expiring. When he hit the shot, I almost jumped out of my seat cheering for him. After some made free throws UT ended up beating Kansas by a score of 76-68.

Wait...did I just say I cheered for a player from UT? Yep. I can't believe it, but I did. Over the duration of the game I found myself cheering for David over Goliath. The only reason I can explain is that I felt bad for what had happened to the players on the UT team. I've sorta felt like if it was me playing on a team and four other players virtually ruined my season, I'd be pretty pissed. So for some reason, in that moment, I cheered for UT.

I actually think that good will come from this for both teams. Kansas in my mind, needed a loss like this to give them a dose of reality that they are not as good as the polls might suggest. Let me say that they are arguably the best and most talented team in the country, but they've had a crummy non-conference schedule highlighted by a near loss to scrappy Memphis and Cornell teams and a blowout win over a horrible UCLA team. The only good win they've had so far is a blowout at a nationally ranked Temple. I think this is just the medicine this team to come together and play better before their conference play starts. Bill Self said this after the game, “When you talk about all the stuff they have been through, I do not think Tennessee was a team until this past week. I do not think Kansas is a team yet.”

Bruce Pearl will surely use this win as a spring board going into SEC play and tell his players that anything is possible when you come together and play like a team. The SEC is a weak basketball conference this year so the chances of UT doing well is still a possibility.

Let me say this again, I AM NOT A UT FAN by any stretch of the means nor to I care for Bruce Pearl all that much (I like to call him the "Sweaty One"). But a walk-on burying a shot with the time running out on the clock is one of the cooler things that happens in sport (unless they hit it against your team). Make no mistake about it though, the UT players showed a ton of heart last night and effort outlasted talent. While I won't be singing Rocky Top anytime soon, I do salute the players for a great effort and something that they'll always remember.

Go Cats! (This post had too much orange in it)

* according to the polls

Thursday, January 7, 2010

My Top Fantasy 5 Gifts

Do any of you ever come across a something that you want so bad that you can almost taste it? Yeah, I do as well. Since we are a species that is always looking for what's next and not what we've got, I thought I would post a few things that I "want" my wife to get me in the coming years. Keep in mind these gifts aren't easy gifts to come by.

I'm writing this publicly so my wife has no excuse to not get these for me. She is allowed to utilize her mom in acquiring these gifts since she always does pretty well in the gift giving dept.

Here is my list:

#5. Universal Remote.

I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, that's not that big of a deal, people have universal remotes and they are easy to come by. However, the universal remote that I want is the similar to the one in the movie "Click." How amazing is that remote?!?! You can mute real life and fast forward life to bypass inconsequential things such as tying your shoes and cleaning house. How cool would it be to fast forward having to walk outside to start your car in the morning and freeze your tail off having to scrape ice off the windows? I'd also love to go back in time and see key moments in my life. I always tease my wife about how we spent all that money for her to wear that white dress once. So I wouldn't mind going back to see her in it again. Anyone have a little sister that drives you crazy? I do. So how about when she brings you her new boyfriend over to meet you and she tells you she really likes him. Well, you can pause him and leave him there to go talk to her about how she's never allowed to date as long as you are alive and if she doesn't listen you can just pause her too. Anyone gone over to a house that has those yappy little dogs? MUTE. Done.

See....Universal Remote would be cool!

#4. Memory Stick. Once again, this isn't what you are thinking. This is that little stick thingy from the movie "Men in Black" where you hold it up, put on sunglasses and have someone look at the red light....

BLAMMOO. Memory gone. So when I've got a professor that is telling us she needs a 10 page paper...BLAMMOO! No more paper. When Mrs. McGoo wants me to do the laundry...BLAMMOO! No more laundry to wash. (Side note. I think my father in law has one and has used it one too many times on his wife cause she still calls me "what's his name")

#3. Hoverboard. "Back to the Future" was one of my favorite movies and one of the reasons is because of that hoverboard that Marty McFly used when he traveled to the future. It's like a skateboard but it doesn't have any wheels.

It "hovers" about 8 inches off the ground and would be great for use in any weather since I wouldn't have to worry about sliding in the snow or slipping when it rained. This would be great for walking Kodi. Dexter...not so much

#2. Iron Man Suit. My next two are going to be hard to get for gifts since they are probably the most pricey, which is why I've got these as my top 2. How awesome would it be to have this suit? Flying? Check. Bulletproof? Check. Infrared vision? Check. Invisibility? Check. Super Strength? Check. The suit has it all and I want it! I bet it even has it's on personal massage unit located in the feet for really long days. What I wouldn't give for that! Another thing that would be neat about it is to be able to fly it over to another country to see the world. **Down side to that is you can't take someone with you** (Then again that could be a plus as well)

Here's a guy that got one as a gift and is showing it off around the farm

#1. Transporter. No, not like the guy in the movies that takes you from one point to another. This is like the ones you see in "Star Trek" where you go from a spaceship to a planet. Obviously mine would be on a smaller scale where I'd just go from home to school, or home to watch my wildcats play at Rupp Arena, or home to Austrailia. Heck, I could even take it from the bed to the toilet and would never have to touch the floor. This would also solve the dilemma that was talked about with the Iron Man suit that you can't take someone with you. Basically this would be the gift that keeps on giving to all my family and friends. It practically sells itself.

Someone caught a picture of some friends sneaking out to grab lunch

Now everyone knows what is expected of Mrs. McGoo in the future. I certainly don't expect these all at once or expect all of them within a year. I'd say a reasonable goal is to accomplish acquiring at least one a year and go from there. Hopefully she can start with the Universal Remote so I can take care of a that sister issue.

Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Working Out

I'm not much into resolutions, so I've never been one to make them when the new year happens. However, this year I have given myself a couple of things that I'm going to try and improve on. I'll get in to a few down the road, but one in particular is to get in better shape. I'm not going to say lose weight because that is basically one focus.

For me, getting in shape is incorporating a few things: Healthy lifestyle, weight loss, muscle building, and feeling better about myself. Outside of incorporating those into my life, I do have some other motivating factors such as setting a goal and accomplishing it, looking better for my wife, and money. Yep. Money is on the line here and I will explain more later. For now, let's talk about what we're doing.

The wife and I have started working out in the morning to a workout video. So how lucky am I? I get to wake up to this every morning.

Yep fellas, I'm that lucky guy. No this isn't my wife...she's really hot too. This is Jillian Michaels. Better known for her work on the "Biggest Loser" on NBC. Well, my hottie trainer is taking time away from her busy schedule to work my wife and I out in some skimpy outfits in the morning and has designed personal program just for me and NO ONE ELSE. Let me just say that I wasn't really cool with waking up and working out, but this made it worth my while...

Oh and doing something with my wife as well. Heh of course.

All joking aside, Jillian has designed a 20 minute workout for out of shape people like me. It incorporates some cardio and weight training into the routine with little stops. Hey, I like to rest like the best of them, but if you rest in a 20 minute workout, you end up doing a 10 minute workout. Nonetheless, we started this workout tired, cranky, and cold. Jillian and her two equally incredibly fit, attractive helpers went through a series of stretching and workouts that got me warmed up and loose. I started it out thinking this is easy and she's hot. I've got to admit that the first five minutes of the video I focused more on Jillian and her friends than I did on what I was doing. (Gentle nudge to my wife to wear skimpy clothes tomorrow morning and not pjs)

I'm doing this workout and for some reason I start to get fatigued. I don't really know why, but I do. My legs start getting a little less stable and my arms start to hurt. My focus has gone away from Jillian and her skimpy outfit to "I can't lift my arms" and "my legs aren't working right." Then I start to think, "I've got ten more minutes of this crap...what in the heck am I doing?!" At about the 15 minute mark, Jillian had us lay down on our workout mats (an area rug with dog hair on it for me) and start doing crunches. All I know is that for 2 minutes or so, I didn't look at the TV. How could I, I'm laying down looking up at the ceiling praying for help from the man upstairs. I was in the middle of praying to the good Lord and Jillian interrupts me. She tells me to get back up and start working on finishing out my cardio.

Now see...this is an important part of the morning here. She's beginning to get on my nerves now and this is something like what she said. "Alright guys, we're in the home stretch and we're almost there. Going to finish strong with some light cardio and we're finished."

This is what I heard. "Kelly, get your pathetic a-double ss's up off that ground and push through this you little sissy (female dog). If you think for one second that you are through with this workout you've got another thing coming. COME ON YOU PANSY I'm not done with you yet and I'm going to make you throw up. You want to objectify me? I'll show you, you little punk."

About this moment when she said all those extremely rude and hurtful things to me, I had it. I got up to look at the TV and tell her a piece of my mind. When I did, I saw this....

WHAT!?!?! Where'd my hottie go? You wanna know? She left because I got so pissed off at her and cussed her out (in my mind) and this is what she turned in to.

So the moral of the story ladies is that even men have vivid imaginations.

Here's hoping Jillian comes back tomorrow morning and stays. I'll let you know. Got to go ice the legs.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Hot Date (High School Style)

So I'm taking my wife on a date tonight. I can't remember the last time we went out just the two of us. We stay so busy with work and school and other activities that I decided to make an executive decision to filter it all out for a night.

So what are we going to do? I'm taking her to my favorite BBQ restaurant the "BBQ Shop" and then we're heading to a movie.

Now let's see...what to see, what to see...

I've got it. Elementary My Dear Watson

New SI Cover

I can't wait to pick up two copies. One for me and one for their #1 fan in Kansas City.

A little bit of me

Since some of you that read this don't know me as well, consider this a learning experience. I've learned a lot about myself lately, and just thought I'd share.

First of all, I'm a very passionate person. When I believe in something, or think I'm right I will argue my point without giving up easily. I know that I am not always right, but until someone proves me wrong, I will not give up. I will voice my opinions and my views and I do not care what people think, because I am real. I am sensitive to a person, but I'd rather be real than be a fake any day.

Second, I'm hard on myself. I tend to be too hard on myself all the time. I am always disappointed in myself; always think I'm not good enough. Things that happen to you in life can make you doubt your self worth. I've learned that. It’s letting go of them things and believing your something great that’s the hard part. Combine that with the desire to always excel in everything you do, it makes it hard to ever just love who you are. Every time you don’t succeed, or someone corrects you, you feel as though you are worthless.

Third, I put myself out there a lot and I've found that being real is much more satisfying than acting as if nothing is ever wrong. I know who I am, I know life isn't always perfect, and I refuse to portray a false image of myself. I hope that someday I can reach out to someone else because I've made it through all the trials of life. It’s much easier to reach someone when you've walked in their shoes.

Fourth, I don’t do enough for myself. I always put others before myself...but I happen to like it that way. I think I get more joy out of others being happy than doing things to make myself happy. I'd rather have nothing at all and give everything to the people I love. I hate getting things, but I love giving them. I've always been a giver, and I will continue to give all that I can, whether physical things, emotional support, or just a smile.

Some of these things will come out in my writing the more I write. Hopefully I can keep up as sometimes I struggle to find things to write about.

Monday, January 4, 2010

So long Paw Paw Brooks

This morning Rich Brooks announced his retirement as head football coach of the University of Kentucky Wildcats.

I must go on record and say that I am actually sad to see him gone. I do think it is time for him to retire, but I grew to like the old guy over the years. His overall record at UK was 39-47 in seven years at UK, but keep in mind he took over a team in probation with huge scholarship hits. What I like is that he went 30-22 over his last four seasons with the wildcats with bowl games in each of the four.

I think it is safe to say he truly is leaving this program in better shape than it was when he inherited it and not many coaches can say that. Coach Brooks also did it the right way. He graduated his players and for being an old school coach, his players really liked him. While not the big name like many coaches in the SEC, he is very well respected by his fellow coaches. I applaud the UK Athletics dept for sticking with Brooks early on when things were not going well. They took a chance on Brooks, much like he took a chance on UK and it really worked out well.

A players coach - Rich Brooks with players

Our next coach will be Joker Phillips who is the offensive coordinator and has been the "coach in waiting" for two years now. I think it was a good decision two years ago to lock him in and keep him in the Commonwealth as the next coach. He's a very good recruiter and is an offensive coach. I do question his play calling some, but who doesn't question a coach here and there.

Best of luck to Coach Brooks in whatever he ends up doing...which sounds like enjoying grandchildren and some fine Makers Mark whiskey that he had presented to him.

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Cats feast on Cardinal

In what was an otherwise ugly game marred by turnovers and bad calls and a sweet forearm shot to the face, the Cats put away the filthy Cards 71-62.

 Nothing like killing off some cardinal

It's a rivalry game and they get nasty but I kinda like it that way, ya know.  This world is a little too p.c. when everyone hugs and stuff before/during/after the game.  I want my team to take a rivalry as serious as the fans do, so I loved the bad blood that went on today.  

I don't know what I like more..beating the Cards or putting a whoopin' on the Vols?!?!  Eh...I like both equally.

Well Done Cats!  Well Done.